[LVS] The Great Hoe Bounty!

[LVS] The Great Hoe Bounty!

Postby Mellorian » Sat Aug 08, 2020 8:34 pm

Greetings Lvs folk!

With the recent nether update having had time to settle, I wanted to offer up a little challenge to any interested and interesting individuals - The Great Hoe Bounty!
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The rules are simple!
Whomever on LVS has the highest broken Netherite! hoe stat by the Lvs council meeting on the 22nd of August 2020, gets all of my diamonds on said server!

The judging will be done at some point around the meeting, so be sure to attend! And via the calc command:
Code: Select all
!calc stat('broken.netherite_hoe')

If there is a tie, then the diamonds will be split between the winners!

Everything outside of the calc stat is free game, feel free to obtain/break the hoes however you like (within server rules).

Good luck, and feel free to ask any questions below!
Last edited by Mellorian on Wed Aug 12, 2020 1:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Tongue in Beak - Behind the Fez

Postby Susy the Parrot » Mon Aug 10, 2020 11:19 am

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Susy: Hello! And welcome to Tongue in Beak - the segment where I interview the hip and happening Zedlings of Zedwork!

Susy: Today's interview takes place in a strange land called "LVS", and I tell ya, flying over here was a nightmare! I almost lost my left wing to a ruined portal someone had decided to plonk down in the middle of the highway, why I nether!

>Pause for canned laughter

Susy: Anywho, I'm over here now, and I have to say, I'm enjoying the melon seeds - a local delicacy, or so I'm told. But enough about me, let's get down to the nitty gritty! I'm here in the LVS studio with none other than the Cobble Enthusiast themselves! Mellorian!

>Applause

Mellorian: Thank you Parrot Susy! May I call you Susy? It's an honour to be on the show, I'm a big fan, big fan!

Susy: Oh stop, you charmer, you! Let's get straight into the good stuff shall we? Everyone is dying to know - what's all this about a Hoe Bounty?

Mellorian: Well, I'm glad you asked Susy. The Great Hoe Bounty is a wonderful little contest that pushes the boundaries of what we know, and really explores an expression of artistic freedom. I think we all here can agree, it is as much a statement as it is a challenge, and we'll be feeling the repercussions of such a poignant, thought provoking event for years to come.

>Polite clapping

Susy: Ah, but not everyone is in concurrence, are they? Let's take a look at a statement from one of the Zriends of LVS -
Dux2333333333 wrote:The prize will be a shulker full of cobble with 12 diamonds in it
Calling it now

Mellorian: Now, I'm glad, I'm glad you brought this up Susy. I really feel strongly about this, very strongly. You see, I am well known, as you pointed out in my introduction, as a Cobble Enthusiast-

>Wolf whistles

Mellorian: Yes, well known as a Cobble Enthusiast, but I'd hate for my political opinions to affect such an important contest. I can guarantee - no, I can assure everyone right now, that the prize will be well worth the... the effort. The dedication. The time. The blood, sweat, diamonds, and pure, wonder-like joy... that I have put into this contest.

>Confused applause

Susy: Well that's all we've got time for in this segment! Take a look at these statements from fellow Zedlings while we take a break, and stick around for more Tongue in Beak, where we'll be interviewing the Wandering Trader, whom believes his job deserves more hazard pay!

>Camera pans out to applause and cheering

Mamery wrote:The first time I used a nethrite hoe was back in 19Dickeddy2.
We had to say "Dickeddy" because the Kaiser had stolen our word "Twenty"

Zodwuck wrote:Damnit. I tried to click Disapprove but I missed and hit the next button over.

Anonymous Nerd wrote:Aren't they the same person?

SwolledLite or whatever his name is now wrote:I agreed that I liked cobble and you do this to me mell.
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The Prelude - Comic

Postby Mellorian » Tue Aug 11, 2020 11:55 am

Meanwhile, two days before The Great Hoe Bounty contest started...
Last edited by Mellorian on Sun Aug 16, 2020 4:25 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Hoe Bounty - The Resource Pack!

Postby Mellorian » Wed Aug 12, 2020 1:02 pm

Tired of the plain old breaking sound when your tools run out of durability?

Bored of the monotonous sadness that comes from breaking your favorite pickaxe?



Well now you can celebrate these momentous occasions with the all new, Hoe Bounty Pack!
Image Get yours today and be one of the cool kids!
Breaking netherite hoes has never been so exhilarating!


(Simply drop the .zip into your resource pack folder, load it in and you're good to go!)
Last edited by Mellorian on Thu Aug 13, 2020 3:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Live Feed from LVS

Postby Mellorian » Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:25 am

Lvsers rn
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Hoes in Space - A Dramatic Retelling

Postby Mellorian » Fri Aug 14, 2020 11:12 am

The year was 2050...

The month was March...

I think it was a Tuesday...

...maybe around 2pm? Idk... timezones are still a big issue, they really should have fixed them like three decades ago smh my head...


Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team stood resolutely at the helm of his trusty ship - the 'Asteroid Boot Passer'. It had been many years since they departed from their home planet, Earth, and Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team grew weary. Their mission was almost fulfilled, with only one last sector to search for remnants of the invasion force.

The invasion force...

Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team remembered them well. They had come not two decades before, laying waste to all in their path. Towns... Cities... That one place in Wales no one can pronounce...
No one could stop them, that is until...

Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team sighed and turned, a single tear dramatically sliding down the side of his face in the way that you only ever see in dubiously successful Hollywood action movies. What was left of the Asteroid Boot Passer's crew were seated in a pleasant, mathematically intelligent, equidistant way that the author doesn't really get and so instead just tells you it's so, around the Captain's chair, in which Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team resides, monitoring the various monitors that show the scans from the monitoring of nearby space. If they were out there, Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team would find them.

A stillness fell over the helm, with only the clacking of keys and steady thrum of the Asteroid Boot Passers main engines to fill the void that so eagerly tried to press in. It would stay that way until- *BWAAAAAAM!*
An alarm blared out across the room, and suddenly everything was chaos! The crew scrambled from their equidistant, mathematically correct chairs and started to run from one side of the room to the other and back, to simulate the spaceship experiencing turbulence - which we don't have the budget for.

"What's going on!?" Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team asked Jerry, Assistant Captain of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team.

"We're picking up enemy forces on all sides, Captain!" Jerry, Assistant Captain of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team shouted in a distinct and inclusive accent over the noise, which you shall have to imagine, as we also do not have the budget for that.

Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team closed his eyes in what he hoped was a pained manner, but to be honest he skipped that lesson in acting school, before turning to the crew, whom were still running back and forth, though in a more haphazard, wheeze filled manner, "Raise the shields to full! Turn her around to face them head on!".

The crew quickly found their ways to the now slightly less mathematical, equidistant chairs and started typing furiously in that way they do in spy/crime films when they don't really know what they're meant to be typing and the screens are all green-screened in post, though we don't have the budget for that either, and so we make sure not to mention them.

With a shudder, Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team's trusty ship, the Asteroid Boot Passer, began to turn, the shields absorbing the now audible impact sounds that are clearly ripped off from Star Wars. Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team made a serious face and gritted his teeth, as though it took physical effort to sit there and do basically nothing the whole time. He didn't want his crew to realize how easy he had it, especially not with the pay gap being so large.

As the ship turned, the large viewing window at the front of the helm - which is probably a bad idea, and makes you wonder why they don't use a large screen or something, rather than basically reinforced glass that is liable to smash and suck people out in an overly dramatic action scene - slowly revealed enemies we'd purposefully left vague until this moment, though given the title and thread this is in, you've probably guessed already what they are. I mean, come on, this meme is getting old already and it's only been what? Five days? Why am I putting so much effort in, and who's even going to read this terrible writing. Honestly, back in my day we h-

Unfortunately we've run out of budget for a narrator, and so will show the rest of this story in epic, and most importantly, cheap paint doodles:




Captain Coblé of the Deep Space Cobble Exploration Team dabs.
Last edited by Mellorian on Thu Aug 20, 2020 12:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sounds to Mine With

Postby Mellorian » Sun Aug 16, 2020 4:23 pm

Tired of generic Minecraft sounds?

Tired of the same old block break after block break?

Well here at the Hoe Bounty forum post, we've tasked our best researches with crafting the perfect, relaxing sounds for all your wart block mining needs. Drift off into outer space with your very own tailored block breaking, placing and all round relaxing sounds.
youtu.be/3Sf0KxYqRKw
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Re: [LVS] The Great Hoe Bounty!

Postby Jasmyn01 » Tue Aug 18, 2020 7:46 pm

Perfectly relaxing. 10/10
Watch Your Back, Creper Sees All! -_-
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The Reward - Comic

Postby Mellorian » Wed Aug 19, 2020 3:59 pm

Meanwhile, in the meeting room...
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The Final Day

Postby Mellorian » Sat Aug 22, 2020 2:00 pm

This is it folks, the end of greatness!

The results will be reviewed some point around the council meeting tonight, so be sure to attend, or you can pop on anytime between now and then and show me your score personally!

Thanks to everyone who's taking part!

Here's a sneak peak at the prizes:
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